Wednesday, December 30, 2009

The big 6


Six years ago (yesterday to be precise) a little bundle of boy came into this world. Ever since then he has blessed us with his energy, his exuberance and his constant smile. It's been a good six years Miles Sam. We're so glad to be your parents. Happy Birthday!

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Impaired?


I was going to keep this story on the down low and just have it be a little joke between Jay and I and our friends Chad and Wendy, but then I found this picture documenting (pretty acurately) the state of things and felt compelled to share. It started with my dislike for turbulance while flying and my sister Christy sharing her secret chemical weapon with me which is totally legal because I have my own prescription but didn't have time to get it filled at an actual pharmacy and therefore she was a proxy. At any rate, I took a small white pill on the flight from Austin to Seattle and 3.5 hours later was still berating Ativan manufacturers everywhere for their lack of effective products. Blah, blah, blah. I was aware of the fact that as we trekked through a slightly hazy SEA-TAC airport, my feet felt sort of balloony and disconnected but at the time it didn't seem like that big of a deal. You know? Sort of like, oh well, I don't really need feet and keep moving. Our friends Chad and Wendy met us at the airport, drove us to our hotel and produced a bottle of wine that they had been saving to celebrate with us. Who could say no to that? Not me for one. Clearly years of medical training is not enough to combat the effects of one ativan tablet. So down it went. We walked 4 blocks to our restaurant. Jay ended up ordering my dinner for me. Not out of chivalry. And that is all I can tell you first hand. I know that we must have walked back to the hotel and I do remember climbing in bed. Jay claims that when he took off my jacket and tucked me in I said "I love you man".
I can tell you two things for sure:
#1. I'm done with the ativan
#2. That was the best nights sleep I have EVER had and I have the pictures to prove it! I don't even remember this picture being taken.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Miles "The Rock" Johnson


While at work last Thursday, I received a call from the medical paraprofessional (I don't know her real title) at Houghtaling Elementary School. It started like this, "Just to let you know, Miles is going to be fine". It turns out Miles disagreed with the music being played in the kindergarten room and using his best problem solving skills, pulled a nice sized rock from the tread of his shoe and stuffed it into his ear canal. Then, because a little muffled music is not good enough, he shoved it back down toward his ear drum. Bad luck for Miles. It just so happened that the principal was walking by the classroom when he explained to the teacher what he had done. It was his first trip to the principal's office as well. You can see by looking at the picture that he is sorry and won't be doing that again. By the way, the rock was extracted by the same doctor who examined Jim for the Coast Guard earlier this year. He has seen the insides of a couple Parrotts now:)

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

10 Years

After 10 years of marriage, Jay and Julie are happier than ever. Those wild and crazy kids. Happy 10 year and 1 month anniversary, Johnsons.


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Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Rice Krispy Magic


The kids and I made rice krispy treats yesterday. (Mostly the kids as I am sick with what can only be the swine flu). That being the case, there was a period of unsupervised cleanup. Here is what I found when I told the kids they could clean out the pan.

Monday, August 31, 2009

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Thursday, August 13, 2009

S.U.B.D.

---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Wed, 15 Sep 1999 20:14:45 -0700 (PDT)
From: katy parrott
To: cjparrott@Harding.edu
Subject: S.U.B.D.

Dear Christy,

I'm writting to inform you that the S.U.B.D. is now in full swing and will in fact, be monitoring you actions involving you selection of dresses for the wedding.

The S.U.B.D. ,Stop Ugly Bridesmaid Dresses, is a non-profit organization that has been put into effect to stop the spread of ugly bridesmaid dresses. S.U.B.D. also offers a support group to help those that have suffered from such things as ugly dresses. Please go through the following check list to see if such a group could be beneficial to you;

1. have you ever stood in front of a mirror and cried at the sight of the dress you were wearing.?
2. have you ever actually thought that a butt bow could only IMPROVE the dress you were wearing?
3. have you ever been forced to wear a dress in one of the following shades; pukey purple-lilac or a creamy mold-sage?

If you answered "yes" to any of the following then this group may be right for you. And temember I'm not only the president of the S.U.B.D. I'm also a member.

Sincerely The President Of The S.U.B.D.,

Katy Parrott

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

A Love Story


This is a story of love.
The story of a dove.

She made her home on our porch fan.
And won't leave, despite heroic efforts by Dan.

For Mrs. Dove, as she has been named,
lives a life of what we have blamed,

As a woman of the night.
Oh yes, a woman of the night.

For Mrs. Dove, you see,
Has gentleman callers a-plenty.

She doesn't learn, that one
That her actions cause a bun (in the oven).

And so she sits on her eggs
Until they hatch and find their legs (or wings).

And then she does it all again,
She takes a visit from one of her "men".

So the cycle repeats,
Because gentleman callers she greets,

As a woman of the night.
Oh yes, a woman of the night.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Day of Rest?


Most days, I consider myself a fairly patient wife. Take for example when my sweet husband Jay announced that he wanted to tour these United States of America on tandem motorcycles. I gamely told him I would buy chaps. However, on this very rainy Sunday, Jay ran through the kitchen and this is what I heard. "ThisisthelasttimeIwalkintheraintogettotheshop!Thanksyourethebest!" Then, when I went down to my laundry room, this is what I saw.
Yep, it's a trap door to man land.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Nu-uh

No lie, this was taken today at HEB. They forgot the all-important "z", but still.

I. Love. Texas.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

New Product!

I thought of the girls in our family recently. I think this would be a great product that we could all get a lot of use from. Maybe we can buy bulk and get a discount? It's important to have one for every occassion, you know, in different shades and sizes.

Monday, August 3, 2009

Vet story


Here's another little tidbit while I'm online and NOT renewing my CPR certification as was the original plan. Just a warning: If discussion of anal gland drainage from dogs disturbs you, this is not the blog posting for you. OK. Here's how it went down. Daisy, the giant hound dog was having an epic battle with her anal glands and copious drainage (nasty but true). After finding evidence of such in my sewing room I immediately phoned the vet for some anal gland touch ups. Naturally I had EB and Miles in tow. When we arrived at the vet's office there was the worlds largest bull dog sitting in his owners lap. The very nice lady who owned the bull dog smiled sweetly and we exchanged pleasantries. This is while things were still good. Miles who is normally sort of quiet until he assesses someone looked that woman in the eye and said "Guess why we're here. We are going to get out dog milked!" The woman's smile faltered but she recovered and said something along the lines of "isn't that nice". I wanted to shush him but got kind of tickled and gave him gum to occupy his mouth.
Luckily we were called in next. The vet checked Daisy's temperature with an ear thermometer which apparently triggered something in Miles' mind because the next thing I know, he is saying "Do you know what? Sometimes when I put my finger in my ear I get stuff out! And do you know what it is? It's meat! Red Meat!" The vet looked at Miles and then me and continued her assessment of nasty hound dog. (Who at this point has been diagnosed with a yeast infection in her ear.) Moving on down the assessment line, the vet has finally made it to the original problem area when Miles once again pipes up, "She is going to need medicine for her mouth too. Because when that stuff came out, she ate it!" The vet tried valiently to keep her composure but sometimes it's got to be hard...
And that's all I have for today. Please enjoy.

Back on the social scene



Katy and I are officially back in the social scene after one month of self induced crafting seclusion. Blueb Fest is done and we are excited to see everyone again. Thanks for limiting your rude comments and eye rolling to only occasionally! Actually thanks for everybody's help. Here are before and after pictures of my living room. Actually- there are no after pictures. You already know what the living room normally looks like. It's just that the before pictures were so bad!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

This one goes out to you CJ-O


This is an original birthday song written to no particular tune for my fabuloso middle seester. It goes a little something like this:
This is a birthday song,
a happy birthday song.
Although the day is wrong,
A happy birthday song. (Think of this as the chorus)

Hope you had a good one.
Hope that it was great!
With lots and lots of fun-fun
and cake upon your plate.

Chorus.

You are a smashing suster,
you know that you're the best.
Whenever there's a cluster,
you handle it with zest.

Chorus. (Here's where the cadence of the song changes a bit and melds into sweet poetry)

Finally I end this song
and bid you sad adieu.
Thankfully I have no lisp
to change this message true.

For if my speech were so impaired,
twould change the meaning round.
Instead of singing you a birthday wish,
a thong you would have found!

I LOVE YOU CHRISTY! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

I can blog!


Ok people. This blog thing is not as easy as some people have led me to believe. Specifically my seester Christy. In the past she has made comments such as "why don't you ask Elizabeth to show you how". No bitterness here. Just proving a point... And what is that point? Simply that I can do this and do it without help from my 7 year old daughter.
As a point of interest, this photo was taken during our trip to Florida. Our sweet friends, the Blankinships showed us their favorite haunts. Did everyone else know that there are crabs in the world that crawl around IN THE TREES?!?

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Sisters


This goes out to all the sisters in my life - Julie, Katie and Katy.
I love you girls!

Tuesday, March 17, 2009


This is the very disturbing story of an unnamed girl (well refer to her as Julia in this story) and her plans to "one-up" her innocent, peaceful and very naive brother (well refer to him as Jeremiah Johnson just to keep it easy).

Jeremiah, being a simple and unsuspecting sort of man, went to his doctor seeking and expecting nothing more than a routine physical exam. This was nothing new to Jeremiah, he had been here before and erroneously thought he had nothing to fear. No doubt at the same moment that Jeremiah was sitting peacefully in the waiting room, trying to calm his soul for the upcoming appointment; Julia was in a dark back hallway conspiring with the unknowing doctor to practice her malcontent and her warmongering.

As the nurse led Jeremiah to the room that would be his demise, there was a brief moment where he passed Julia in the hall and their eyes met. This moment had happened before and had almost always led to a courteous and mutually beneficially peaceful exchange of pleasantries. This time however, something was different. Jeremiah couldn't quite put his finger on it; there was just something in the way she was smiling, something in the look in here eyes as if she had made a deal with the devil himself! The brief interaction left Jeremiah with shivers going up and down his spine and was the first moment when he knew that something was desperately out of place.

Once inside the nefarious room of pain and suffering (the doctors waiting room), Jeremiah waited, wondering if the butterflies in his stomach could in fact somehow escape, as they were trying so desperately to do. As the moment of truth came and the doctor entered the room, Jeremiahs fears were assuaged by his kind face and overwhelming truth-telling manner. There was no need to be nervous or to lose heart, this man would obviously do right and fulfill his obligation as a healer and as one to bring hope, not despair.

The first few minutes of the physical were quite routine and it just seemed like "business as usual" for both Jeremiah and the doctor. Quite suddenly the atmosphere in the room changed and the friendly bedside manner of the doctor seemed to vanish. Where only moments before the doctor had employed the most note-worthy bedside manner and exceptional kindness, now there was a harsh and commanding presence that seemed very out of place. Gone was the small talk and idle chit chat of moments ago, harshly replaced with the sound of a latex glove being thrust onto a hand. No more was the smile and caring demeanor, instead only a squirt of jelly lubricant and a none-to-gentle order to, "drop your drawers!"

In that moment, Jeremiahs very soul was crushed almost to the point of death. His gentle and innocent spirit, stomped on in the most atrociously villainous way imaginable. His body preparing for the ultimate violation, Jeremiah did the only thing he could do; he prayed to God and begged the doctor for mercy. It was obvious that there was an internal battle waging in the doctor whether to honor the dark-treaty he had signed (possibly in his own blood) earlier with the treacherous Julia, or to have mercy on the poor, innocent Jeremiah.
The doctor took a step forward and with every millimeter of movement, Jeremiah clinched his resolve tighter and tighter that he would overcome this obstacle to his faith in humanity. At the last moment before major repentance was necessary from the doctor, he stopped and with a sigh admitted to the villainous plot against the virtuous and blameless Jeremiah. As the truth was revealed, Jeremiah did what was in his heart and forgave the conniving Julia; knowing that deep down this was probably just a cry for attention.
And to this day.....he just kind of walks a little different....